The List: Tips and Quips About Life and Fashion
Thoughts on Thongs, Bras, and Boxers
Published: Thursday, March 15, 2012
Updated: Friday, March 16, 2012 00:03
Okay—so I get it. Figuring out what underwear to wear can be tricky.
Oh wait. No. It’s not. It’s frickin’ simple, but there are apparently a lot of people on campus who are stuck in their awkward middle school just-discovered-bras phase.
Hopefully these tips can help, because every time I see an underwear faux pa I cringe, and lately I’ve been cringing to the point where I look epileptic.
1) NO ONE WANTS TO SEE YOUR BRA UNLESS THEY ARE TAKING IT OFF. Seriously ladies, we are the biggest offenders when it comes to underwear related offenses. Dresses, spaghetti straps, low cut, and backless shirts? DON’T wear them unless you’ve got the proper strapless, halter, or t-shirt bra. Need help finding the right bra? Most retailers offer free measurements so you can find the perfect size and shape. The JCPenny’s in the Green Mountain Mall offers this service, so take advantage of it. Facebook photos with the bra hanging out? TRASHY. These photos can be sexy when texting the boyfriend, but make for super trashy profile pics. Caution: He’s definitely showing the sexts to his bros—and potentially all of Facebook if the break up is bad.
2) GENTLEMEN: YOU LOOK LIKE A TOOL WITH YOUR BOXERS HANGING OUT. It’s just as bad as women and their bra straps. Buy a belt. Nuff’ said.
3) Panty Lines. Just typing that makes me cringe. Don’t have them. If you insist on wearing yoga pants outside of the gym (another cringe) AT LEAST wear a thong so the panty lines disappear. Or don’t wear underwear. I just don’t want to see it.